Virtual Insanity
by Cosmic Gerbil
Summary: Cyrus has always had a fascination with machines so is comes as no surprise to his Commanders when he creates a sentient robot. Will Cyrus prefer her company over that of his Commanders? How will they feel about that? With thanks to tiguidi123 and BlackGeneralNocturna for story ideas and input!
1. Chapter 1

**Part 1**

It was no secret that Cyrus, leader of Team Galactic, preferred the company of machines over people. Machines performed better, had less malfunctions and didn't possess confusing and inconvenient emotions. Therefore, after a hard and stressful day of running Sinnoh's premiers villainous team (complete with unpredictable emotions), Cyrus calculated that he was more than justified to spend an hour in an evening, indulging in his hobbies.

Now after a couple of months, the fruits of Cyrus's' labour were complete and he was ready to introduce his new creation to his Commanders. Mars and Jupiter had unfortunately been struck down by a bad bout of emotions and had gone to the movies to watch the sort of romantic film that Cyrus knew would be the first thing to be deleted in his new universe. However, Commander Saturn was available and so he was privileged to be the first to see exactly what Cyrus had been working on these past few weeks.

"I hope that you will be impressed, Commander," said Cyrus, indicating towards a curtain.

"Yes, of course Boss," Saturn said, while privately thinking Please don't let it be a machine that delivers lectures while Cyrus is asleep.

Anybody else might have said "Behold!" in a dramatic voice while pulling back the curtain. As this was Cyrus, he simply replied with a monotone "Yes" and then revealed his new invention.

"Wow, cool!" Saturn exclaimed. Standing in the alcove was a very attractive female robot.

"Yes," Cyrus agreed.

"Boss, that's really awesome!" said Saturn. "I never imagined you'd make anything like her".

"Thank you, Commander," Cyrus said. "It was a delicate and difficult challenge but I believe I have been successful in my endeavour".

"I agree," said Saturn, admiring the robot. "What's her name?"

"She doesn't have a name. She's a machine".

"Oh but you have to give her a name!" Saturn exclaimed, shocked. "I mean, she's not just *any* old machine. She's well…a girl!"

"Commander, you're displaying emotions," Cyrus berated.

"OK, OK!" Saturn held his hands up. "I'm sorry Boss; you don't have to name her".

"Yes, I know," said Cyrus. "Now I will activate her and see if she runs as programmed".

"Boss? Can *I* name her?" Saturn asked.

Cyrus sighed.

"I shall indulge you, just for some peace". Saturn grinned and Cyrus wen behind the robot. He opened a panel in her back and pressed a large green button. The robot moved slightly, raising her eyelids to reveal a pair of glowing, amber eyes. Her head titled and her mouth began to move.

"Initialising," she said in a surprisingly feminine voice. (Saturn had half expected her to have Cyrus's voice). "Accessing data. Activating memory chips. Activating storage devices. Adjusting visual and auditory data".

"So far, so good," said Cyrus.

"Boss, what do you think of Samantha?" Saturn asked.

"Who is Samantha?"

"As a name for your robot?"

"Shush, Commander. You're going to distract her and cause her to malfunction".

"Initialisation complete," the robot announced. "Data initialised. Memory chips, functioning correctly. Storage devices, functioning correctly. Visual and auditory data, functioning correctly".

She looked at Cyrus and Saturn and spoke to them brightly.

"Good evening. It is 19:35 on the 7th June. Welcome to the Team Galactic Base. Hello, Master Cyrus. Hello Commander Jupiter".

Saturn gasped. Cyrus nodded in satisfaction.

"Yes. She is operating correctly".


	2. Chapter 2

**Part 2**

"Boss, she called me Jupiter!" Saturn protested. "How is that operating correctly?"

"It is an easy error to make," said Cyrus. "She just needs her data bank updating".

"Yes but, me and Jupiter are nothing alike! Jupiter is...well..." Saturn indicated curves with his hands.

"New greeting method aquired," Samantha suddenly announced. "Testing new greeting method. Hello, Commander Jupiter". Samantha copied Saturn's previous hand movements. Saturn gaped in a silly manner.

"Good," said Cyrus. "As you can see, Commander, Sam...I mean the robot is able to learn new information from her surroundings".

"Yeah but..." Saturn made to flap his hands, then stopped, in case Samantha coped that too. He decided to try and talk to the robot.

"Ok Samantha, let me introduce myself properly. Hello, I'm Commander Saturn".

Samantha gave Saturn a quizzical look.

"Can you understand me?" Saturn placed his hand on his chest helpfully. "Me, Saturn".

"Commander, she isn't Tarzan...I mean Jane," Cyrus pointed out.

"Saturn," Samantha repeated. "Tarzan. Jane!"

"Saturn, you are causing her to malfunction!" Cyrus complained.

Before Saturn could defend himself, the door swooshed open and the real Jupiter entered the lab.

"Oh Boss, Saturn, there you are," she said. "I've been looking all over for you".

"Good evening, Commander Jupiter," said Cyrus. Saturn grinned and waved.

Samantha looked at Jupiter, then at Cyrus, then back at Jupiter.

"New life form correctly identified," she announced.

"New what?" Jupiter stared at Samantha curiously, not quite sure what she was. "A life form? Where?"

"Hello, Commander Jupiter," said Samantha, moving her hands to indicate curves.

"What? What is she *doing*?" Jupiter demanded, giving Cyrus and Saturn a stern look.

"Saturn taught her that," Cyrus said. Saturn yelped and hid behind his Boss.

"She thought I was you...I mean, you were me," he gasped. "Before now, I mean, when Master Cyrus first activated her. I was trying to show her how we were...different!"

"I...see?" Jupiter questioned. However, she seemed somewhat mollified by this explanation and Saturn breathed a sigh of relief.

"Well, this is certainly interesting". Jupiter relaxed and smiled at the robot. "Ok then, so I think you know I'm Commander Jupiter. What is your name?"

"Saturn!" announced Samantha. "Tarzan! Jane!"

"Ah! She still needs...a few minor adjustments," said Cyrus.


	3. Chapter 3

**Part 3**

"I shall attend to any adjustments momentarily," said Cyrus. "Commander Jupiter, what was it that you wanted to see me about?"

"Oh yes," said Jupiter. "I just came to tell you that Mars was looking for you because she wanted to tell you...oh never mind. Here she is now".

Sure enough, Mars walked in through the open door. Before Cyrus could ask why Jupiter needed to tell him about Mars when she was here herself, Mars noticed the new robot and spoke up.

"Boss, who is that?" she asked.

"Identifying new life form," Samantha announced, staring at Mars, her eyes swiveling and glowing brightly.

"She called Samantha," Saturn said helpfully.

"It's a robot I made, which Commander Saturn insisted on calling Samantha," Cyrus said.

"New life form correctly identified," said Samantha. "Hello...Galactic Boss Cyrus".

"...that's not quite correct," said Cyrus, which Saturn and Jupiter laughed. "Commanders, control your emotions".

Mars looked perplexed. "Boss, why does she think I am you?"

"She seems to be having trouble with her facial recognition software," said Cyrus.

"Um, OK then but we look nothing alike".

"Yeah Boss, you look more like this," said Saturn. He adopted a stern expression, stood up straight as a pole and put his hands behind his back.

"New greeting method acquired!" Samantha chirped. She copied Saturn's stance and expression. "Hello Galactic Boss Cyrus. I am Tarzan".

"Please Commanders, your emotions are becoming extreme," Cyrus said, as all three Commanders laughed. "The robot is delicate artificial intelligence; there are bound to be a few glitches along the way".

"I think maybe Samantha only possesses the _artificial_ part," Jupiter quipped.

"Commander, she is fully capable of learning," Cyrus scolded. "It's just...she seems to be learning all her information from Saturn".

"Oho, so that's where the lack of intelligence comes from".

"Hey!" Saturn protested.

"Jupiter, don't be mean," said Mars. She turned to Cyrus. "Boss, why did you make a girl robot?"

"Mars is jealous," Jupiter smirked.

"I am not! Shut up, potato brain!"

"New greeting method acquired!" Samantha trilled. "Potato brain. Shut up, potato brain. Hello, potato brain..."

"No! Sama...I mean, robot. New greeting method forbidden!" Cyrus said. "That's...rude!"

"Understood. New information acquired. Potato brain is forbidden!".

Relieved, Cyrus addressed Mars and Jupiter. "I must insist that you both display less emotions. You too, Saturn". This in response to Saturn starting to giggle.

"To answer your question, Commander Mars, it was because female android designs are easier to find than male ones. When I searched for a suitable pattern online, I found 9 female ones and just 1 male".

Mars looked relieved but Saturn frowned.

"Boss, what did the male design look like?" he asked.

"Saturn, did you watch the Transformers cartoon when you were a boy?"

"Oh yeah, I remember that".

"...and did you watch the Care Bears too?"

"Erm..." Saturn shrugged, blushing. "Uh well, I know what Care bears look like".

"Then imagine Transformers crossed with Care Bears," said Cyrus, "and you have your answer".


End file.
